vapornoise #1 by Simon Aulman
I'll shoot my zero-cred in the knees by admitting this but these last few sleepless nights I've been watching Best Of DVDs of The Old Grey Whistle Test on the tiny portable DVD machine by my bed. Only a naff and very-predictable person would make the following "joke" (but I am that naff and very predictable person) - if this is the Best Of, what's the Worst Of like ? I can actually remember TOGWT first time around & what a strange distant isolated oasis it was in the middle of the night - even more remote than e.g. the John Peel Show back when Radio 1 used to close down between about 7 and 11 or whenever at night..
Even the exciting dangerous daring punks on TOGWT look ludicrous and the whole experience has reminded me how twattish it is of anyone ever to have believed that music can change anything or even be political in any effective way. I think we've all accepted that now. No one in 2015 expects music to change anything or do anything or be anything - or even much cares if it continues to be made or not. It feels much healthier - this cynicism. But during my moochings around Bandcamp I do sometimes feel that there is one type of "political" liberation-ist music - and that's vaporwave.
A type of music that tries to look and sound like it's completely safe and bland. Always the most dangerous type. Far more dangerous & insidious than the aggressive punk and noise and rap etc etc etc. A type of music that is blatantly illegal. It is the only exciting music around now. IMHO of course. I'm not sure how noise adapts to the vaporwave treatment. It's the only way I've ever made noise. But I feel that my laziness is a political act too.
It amuses me that I'm just about the only member of my family who's never had a career or a mortgage, and I'm the only member of my family who has a house. I've never understood why people work and save up to buy a house. So much easier to marry someone who already owns a house.
When one of you dies, the other one then marries again, and the house passes down thru time without anyone ever needing to work for it and save for it. Oh I know the argument against it - that you need to be conventional and marry someone just like yourself - the same age and the same homelessness and the same class and in the same sort of job. But really, haven't we all learnt yet - that we're all pretty much the same. You can fall in love with almost anyone.
Without a career, you'll have more time to make music. Lazy wonderful music like this. Yes I quite like this one. My dating life has been fairly embarrassingly dire. Britain seems full of middle-aged divorced women who leave you cradling your weeping/laffing head in your hands as you mumble "jeeez I can see why yr divorced - how the fuck did you ever find someone stupid enough to marry you in the first place ?" There are exceptions, but they're rare and highly sought after.
The competiton is too intense to someone who tends to take life's back seat - e.g. myself. But then, when you masturbate, and in the moments after you cum - you thank god you're alone. The thrill of the chase still alive within you. My life right now is a bit like the film Last Days - though about a failed noise muso rather than a successful grunge muso. However it is ludicrous me knocking around here like this - if any of my two followers or zero fans ever wants a free holiday in the New Forest there's plenty of space for yr tent or caravan or camper van or whatever.
