long dance by Kirsten Svuure
Given time (long) and volume (high) this is one of my better pieces - if it's not allowed to overwhelm you in both ways then it will overwhelm you in no ways. Or so I have found.
For the last two and a half years there have been long periods when the streets have been empty. The pandemic lockdowns, obviously. But even between-times so many people have chosen to stay indoors. And there are still plenty of people who are wary of going out. There's the recessions we're now in - the shops are half-empty and the restaurants and cinemas are fully empty. And for the last week or so there's been the heat too. I love it.
I stupidly thought that today a friend and I were going to the New Forest Show. Lordy. It's not till next week isn't it. I'm at a loose end. The CD player in my car bust in the heat a few days ago and so driving is now no fun. Ah I can't think of anything to do and I don't want to think of anything to do and I don't need anything to do - there's too much to do anyway even when there's nothing. It seems to be something that you notice increasingly as you get older - that even doing nothing takes up so much time and energy. It really does. I've been up since 3-30am and have done nothing and simply haven't stopped doing it - it's only when I stop doing nothing and start lying on my sofa and reading a good book that I shall feel like I'm doing something at last. Fuck, the days pass.
Thinking of my friend Dave, who I've not seen for a long time - and one of the reasons is that he's dead. Dead ? No one's shocked/surprised, cos he was "old" .... well not so far from my own age. Shit - does death really happen to people ? REAL people ? People who pack so much life into every day that they have no time for death ? It's startling - and whatever I do it feels like the thing that isn't the real thing that I ought to be doing.
Recorded this morning, photo taken in Salisbury on the hottest day ever or something, though it didn't really break any records hereabouts, I was in the wrong place again.
