hedonist from tragicomedy by Brodie Milner

i stopped reading dystopian novels
when i realised that i was living inside of one
i stopped reading romantic fiction
when i realised that i would never find love
and i stopped reading between the lines
and the small print on my parking fines
and i started taking bad advice
from inspiring quotes that said
‘the key to life is this…’

‘ambition is free,
success costs,
failure pays dividends,
victory holds hands with loss.
tomorrow’s happiness comes at no cost
if tomorrow never comes.’
i swapped citalopram for benzedrine
and kale chips for ketamine
i turned my body into train tracks
my fondest moments became violence
i didn’t worry where the time went
i’m a character that Burroughs would be proud of

and i feel so much better now
i feel so much better now

i stopped thinking coherent thoughts
when i realised that i could just think like you
and i stopped writing coherent words
when i realised a stream of consciousness would do
and i started jumping on the trend
of justifying means without the ends
and i know i’m better than your friends
and i know that you think so too

and i feel so much better now
i feel so much better now

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